Second Semester Strugs

High school: 

- Nothing seems to work quite right in a high school building. The heaters only work during the summer and the air conditioning only works in the winter. 

- High school is also the place where the stress of growing up and the stress of fitting in join forces to destroy even the strongest among us. 

I copied parts of the urban dictionary definition of high school, the parts that I agreed with at least. I don't know everything about high school, trust me, but I get what it's like. I agree with the statements above. Some days it seems like absolutely nothing is going right, whether it's the heating and air conditioning, the lunch food, or another failed bio test.  The things I've come to realize at a heightened level in the past few weeks (besides that I might have had a little too optimistic of an attitude about school) is that high school is a serious whirl wind of emotions. Not that you didn't already know that, or maybe you didn't. I'm a super emotional person, I cry on a regular basis primarily because I'm sensitive and I get my feelings hurt easily, but also because my heart gets disappointed in the smallest of things. I've learned with a heart that isn't really connected with my brain that I make a lot more of my decisions based on what my heart tells me and that I act on my heart. Some days I want my head to understand and deal with what my heart doesn't need and it just doesn't happen. I think that with a heart like mine you have to be careful because I do get my feelings hurt so easily. 

I've learned the power of a thank you and one singular text and how that can completely turn my day around. I've learned that people more often times than not will let you down. I've learned that sometimes you have to squeeze the truth out of people you trust. I've learned to value friendships for what they are, not who introduced you. I've learned to embrace new opportunities with an optimistic attitude. I've learned that anger doesn't solve anything and sometimes silence is your best option. I've learned that people are probably gonna tell you they won't talk behind your back, and they still do. I've learned to be incredibly thankful for long lasting friendships, but also to be okay with starting to let go of others. And I think most importantly what I'm learning and still learn everyday is to let go and let God. Every single one of those things I've learned is something that I need to surrender to Him. I struggle to wrap my head around that on most days, but it's exactly what He wants. 

As I write l those out, I realize that in lots of those situations I want to run (not for exercise), but from the Lord. I heard a message recently about how us running from the Lord relates directly back to Luke 15 with the parable of the lost sheep, the lost coin, and the prodigal son. The thing I walked away with most from that message is the significance of one lost sheep out of 100 and one lost coin (which doesn't seem like much) are so important in realizing how the Lord chases for us. I'm a little all over the place, but I've also spent the last three days in my bible class watching The Passion of the Christ. The movie itself is really intense, but it's the most graphic representation of His love for us. Jesus bared the cross for us, for us not to run during the times we want to, and for us to bear close to Him in those situations when it seems the hardest. Random and a little all over the place, I know. 

To end right back where we started... My definition of high school. 

High school: the place people say you'll find out who your real friends are, the place you learn to deal with relationships between friends, boys, parents, the place you'll feel more stressed than you ever have before, the place some days you don't feel like you can deal with, the place you receive failing grades you don't think you deserve, and the place you begin to discover who you are. 

I don't know how you view high school, and my view of it has changed a little this year. Just as my view has changed in the last few months, it will change again and I know that. Yours may change too! Second semester has been great in most ways, but it's also showed me more things than I probably wanted to know. The best part about it all is while in high school ya live, and ya learn. If you aren't sure what you're view of high school is, I'd encourage you to look to find it. 

- AK

Hola amigos....

Hi America! Or wherever you're reading from...

By the time you're reading this it'll be Wednesday morning and we'll have accomplished 2 whole workdays along with a homestay.

Saturday night & Sunday: We arrived in Managua on Saturday night. Let me tell you, I underestimated the weather. It was humid and so sticky. Thankfully, after a drive out to Esteli (where we're staying the rest of the week) the temperatures cooled down. On Sunday morning/ Easter, we drove 2 hours out to Esteli where we attended a large outdoor (ish) Catholic church. We had our first meal in Nica... chances are I'm the pickiest eater you know which means I was very worried about my eating scenario. I was very pleased when they served french fries at our first meal!!! Little did I know these would become a quite common occurrence. We met our host families and headed out to their homes. Culture shock isn't what I would even call the feelings I experienced. Alexandra and I were in a home together, which I was very thankful for because she is basically fluent in spanish. We rode a packed school bus to the leaders homes. I'm trying to give you a mental image of how crowded this bus was... when you think there is no possible way you can fit another person on a bus with sweating people another person shows up. We were squeezed so tight on that bus that when I went to get off I had to squeeze between 2 fully grown adults with my backpack on. The space to get out was so tiny that someone outside of the bus had to pull me thru a probably 1 foot space. The home stay has been the most interesting part thus far. To fully explain what it was like is nearly impossible. The houses range from simply concrete to more tin. The home we stayed in was 2 bedrooms, tiny multipurpose room with lawn chairs where we ate and hungout, and a kitchen. We didn't use the bathroom at our house once because all we were told was that it was "different". We went to the bathroom at another Young Life leaders house where the situation was nothing compared to an American bathroom. We had to fill a bucket with water in order to force it to flush because there wasn't any water in the tank. 

Monday: On Monday morning, our home stay family took us to see the local school (see picture below). The fully outdoor school had very similar classrooms to those in the states. They were fully equipped with desks, whiteboards, and lots of students. We also noted that all of the students wore uniforms. KR Kids, unis are a thing in Nica too!! We split up for our first work day. All the girls headed to a home where they host YL club and the boys headed the David's house (more manual labor). At the YL club we repainted. When we left for lunch with the group, David (the area director of Esteli) picked us up and we rode in the bed of his truck to have lunch. Since this is illegal in the states, you might not understand what I'm saying. 11 girls were standing up in the back of a pickup truck traveling down dirt roads in the city. Monday was the only day we worked the whole day. The sun rises and it gets light very early here in Esteli which means that we wake up early from all the outside noise. The people in the city rise very early!! The sun sets pretty early too, it is almost dark by 6pm. Monday was an exhausting day, but we spent the evening hanging out as a group and playing some seriously trippy mind games. I was always the last person to figure these things out! It's an awesome feeling to be hanging out with such a different group of students and conversation filled with so much laughter. We have laughed so much.

Tuesday: We spent the morning completing our paint job at the club. We joined up with the rest of the group after a lot of interaction with some of the locals while working. At lunch we had the first member of our team share his testimony. Props to you, Ben for doing this fully in spanish #impressed! We heard our second testimony from a Nica leader. All 19 of us spent the afternoon together along with some Young Life leaders. The girls painted nails and the boys spent the afternoon playing soccer. I also rode a motorcycle!! I was so excited about this. I'm not very adventurous and this seemed so cool to me. My mom wasn't very excited about this especially since I wasn't wearing a helmet. I didn't go very far on it, but super cool!! Once we got back in the afternoon, all of the Americans ventured out to a coffee and ice cream shop. We had a fully American dinner.. chicken tenders... that rocked. We spent the night laughing and playing lots of Mafia. 

My heart is full and I've stepped way out of my comfort zone this week and although I'm put in these uncomfortable situations, I'm so happy to be experiencing this. I continue to ask you for your prayers as we hope to glorify God throughout all of our actions this week. It's so crazy to me that at the time you'll be reading this the week is halfway over. I'm looking forward to seeing how the rest of the week plays out and experience the Lord in more ways.

I hope America is treating you well because Nicaragua sure is treating me well.

Sending all my love,

AK 

NICARAGUA 2015!

HI BLOG!!! 

I've been missing for a while and as I've told you before, I've been lacking in the idea department. I figured now would be the perfect time to blog and inform you on my future whereabouts. 

By the time you're reading this, I'll be on a the way to Nicaragua. This is something I've never done before. I'm the girl that likes to stay inside of her comfort zone with everything from travels to the food I eat. As I enter the week with a little uncertainty, I'm so excited to see how the Lord plans to use myself and friends over the next week. I'm so thankful to be going to serve alongside some great friends who have similar worries. I don't even know if you call these worries, more a fear of the unknown. The next week is going to push me to my limits and I'm very prepared for that. I know I'm going to be put in situations that make me uncomfortbale, but as I prepare to head off, I can't help but maintain a calm spirit knowing I feel pulled to do this. 

I'm hoping to be able to update you all at some point during the week, but I'm unsure of how that plan will work. 

I'm excited to see how the week turns out and really serve. This is the truest example of being the hands and feet of Jesus and what better time than around Easter. 

My heart feels full and I can't help but end this post with the verse... "But He was pierced for our transgressions, He was crushed for our inequities; the punishment that brought us peace was on Him, and by His wounds we are healed" Isaiah 53:5. However you plan to spend this Easter weekend, whether it's alongside family or in a whole different country like me, I hope you take time to reflect in the meaning of this Easter weekend and relish in the power of His love for us. 

Catch ya on the flip side, blog!! 

xo