Optimistic Outlook at the End of 2014

If I haven't shared my whole life with you already, this post is about to make it all very real. I started thinking I would post about the top moments of 2014 and my sweet best friend told me that was a crappy idea because no reader could relate (her blunt side). She told me instead that I should write about the most difficult things that happened to me this year and how I overcame them and sitting where I am today happy as a clam.


I'm writing from Parkland, Florida because my very best friend in the whole world moved here right after our sophomore year. Probably the biggest struggle of my whole year because even today on Dec 30 when I am spending time with her, it sucks to know that I'll have to go home and we'll be 662 miles apart, again. You never think stuff like this will happen to you because I thought it wouldn't happen to me and the day I said goodbye to my best friend for who knows how long might have been one of the hardest days I've experienced. We said goodbye in May and honestly it kinda felt like she was just leaving on a vacation, until school started in August and she wasn't there. I won't give you all the details or the amount of times I've found myself crying over how much I miss her, but what I can tell you is that stuff like this happens and you think it will be the hardest thing ever and for a while it will be. Mallary and I talk every single day and it feels (now after months of living apart) like in some aspects we still do high school together. Typically you would have to work hard at salvaging a friendship like ours, but with the help of frequent talks and 3 visits between Atlanta and Parkland, I can honestly tell you that our friendship isn't any different. I won't avoid the truth because somedays are a lot worse than others and sometimes the hurt we feel from being apart feels like it will never dissipate, but our friendship has prevailed. I am so thankful for that and the friends she's made in Parkland and those who have surrounded me in Georgia because it has made the transition a lot easier.

The second most challenging and heartbreaking thing I dealt with in 2014 was heartbreak. I dated the same guy for 18 months (a long time, I know!!). We broke up at the beginning of our junior year. I can tell you one thing, they don't call it heartbreak for no reason. I've never felt anything that literally broke my heart like that ever before. The days after were tough, telling friends, explaining what happened, even making it through the day without tears was so challenging. It probably took me about a month to realize that sitting around feeling sad for myself and my achy breaky heart wouldn't solve anything. I think everyone expected me to be more sad for a lot longer, my family included. I mean what do you expect? What I came to realize is that neither of us did anything wrong you just come to realize at some point that you are better apart than together and we did. For a while I forgot that I could do things on my own and I find myself today doing things completely different. I think if you talked to the people surrounding me they would tell you that I am not the same girl as I was in the relationship. We always had fun together, but I find myself having more fun surrounded by friends and family than I ever did when we were together. I am incredibly thankful for the friends who surrounded me during this dark couple of weeks in 2014 and I am so happy to say that I am independent and I wouldn't have it any other way, atleast for now.

I always like to try to expand my friend group and for the longest time it was kind of a struggle, I always had a set friend group. When 2 girls in our group moved before school this year I found myself trying to expand. I've created such strong friendships this year and although sometimes challenging (especially with 20 girls in your grade) I love the girls I surround myself with and the laughs we have together, especially the heated lunch table convos. 

I'd be lying if I told you that these rough moments made 2014 suck, because it hasn't. Out of these hard moments I've gained such huge things. I've spend time with my best friend in her city and in mine that can never be replaced. I channeled my broken heart towards things that mended it (blog). I have created such strong friendships. On some days, I let these moments catch up to me and they get the best of me, but what I didn't tell you is the highlights of this year, and those made up for every low moment 

Christmas Traditions!

Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays!! 

Sitting down to write this post is quite the challenge considering I've been thinking about Christmas traditions for probably a week. I've known that I wanted to post on this, but what to say has been hard to figure out.

The things that my family and I do around Christmas don't seem like something extraordinary, but they are things that we do year after year.

1. At the start of the month, we go as a family to Scottsdale Farms to pick out the tree. As we walk in, we decide that we'll all aimlessly wander for a while as we look for the tree that we really love. This is the part they normally lose me at. I would prefer to sit by the fire and stay warm until they find the finalists. 

2. I guess 1 and 2 go together, but we also decorate the tree together. The girls and I work on the real tree in the family room and Dad does the fake tree in the formal living room. This year we decided to do popcorn strings on the tree, I did way more popcorn eating than actual popcorn stringing. It does look really cool needless to say. 

3. As we get closer to Christmas, we spend the holidays at our house. On Christmas Eve we go to church with the whole fam and then everyone heads back to our house and has dinner. On Christmas Day, everyone will be back here for presents. I love Christmas Day really just because everyone is here together. My family rocks and I'm so thankful to spend the holidays with them! 

4. Oh and one last thing! We visit Santa at Phipps Plaza every year. I've been going since 1998! This year was my seventeenth visit, not even for the picture but the video!!! 

Merry Christmas! 

MY NEW ROOM

Welcome back y'all! 

Merry Christmas, you survived finals week!! 

As most of you might know, my family has been renovating our house since this past June. We've been working on the kitchen and family room for what feels like an eternity. I am so happy that we've completed that project, but also ecstatic that my semi-incomplete room has finally been completed. I was so excited when I got home on Wednesday and it was done. I am so excited to finally share it with you all! 

My room is exactly how I envisioned it looking when we started re-doing.

The bed spread is from Anthropolgie! 

This desk area will be a study spot and work space for me. I love the desk and was honestly a little worried about it being too big when it first showed up in my room. I am very happy with the way it looks now.

You can tell that not all of the walls are striped. Only 3 walls have 2 horizontal stripes. On the wall with the TV we added some planking that will hold the bunches of polaroids that I have and will continue to take.

I am so excited to share this with you and I can't wait for this room to become a fun place for me to hangout and enjoy before I head off to college next year. 

PS- I will be back before Christmas next week! 

Happy Holidays,

Destressing While Studying for Finals

Hey y'all! 

I have been MIA for about a week, unheard of I know. At the start of the week, on top of all of the stress leading up to finals, I caught what felt like the plague... the stomach bug. That would be the explanation for my absence, but after lots of rest and Netflix, I feel way better! 

The time leading up to finals, or every weekend after Thanksgiving, can be super stressful. Chances are you are worried about doing well on the finals that affect your semester grade. I get it, I am in the exact same boat.

Instead of studying, I decided to do a little research on how to destress (I don't always have the best of ideas on this). The list below is what I've come up with ways to destress this weekend when cramming for finals! 

1. Take frequent study breaks!! This is the one I practice the most, primarily because I am so easily sidetracked and I justify every Twitter check as a study break. The best thing to do is to study for somewhere between 30 minutes to an hour and then take a 10 to 15 minute break. The important thing is not to stretch out study breaks because if you do, chances are you will forget what you even started studying! 

2. Take your Dog for a Walk. The time spent between studying two subjects can easily be spent doing something outdoors. Exercise stimulates your brain. If you are really feeling up to it go to the Greenway. I am sure the fresh air will feel awesome after being trapped in your house studying. 

3. Make a To-Do List. One of the main reasons that my finals stresses are so intense is because I am overwhelmed with the amount of stuff I have to know. When you start studying this weekend, make a To- Do list of your plan for the day. When I sit down on Saturday, I will organize the studying by the order of the finals. I will divide up each part of the day based on the information and the topics. If I divide and conquer, I will chances are be more successful, but able to have fun time in the midst of studying! Going back to #1, I like to reward myself with a break when I accomplish something on the to do list. 

4. Take a Nap. We all need a break that isn't checking twitter or instagram. Take power naps. Do not take one, three hour nap half way thru the studying. Take more frequent 30 minute power naps! 

5. Eat. Try to avoid the junk food, the hardest thing for me. When I am studying, I normally want to just sit and eat from a bag of chips, but if you eat healthier snacks and stay hydrated (WITH WATER) your energy levels will stay high keeping you more motivated to study! 

This is one your mom always tells you, or at least mine does! 

6. Go to bed early. Not only the night before the big test, but the whole weekend. If you get 8 hours of sleep every night leading up to the test, great things are to come. I know it sounds cliche, but go to bed early and eat breakfast the day of the test.

Don't forget to take advantage of studying in groups! Sometimes it's a benefit and other times it only complicates things. Try it this time around!

Good luck on all of your finals to come this week! I hope that these suggestions will help you to take a step back and relax this weekend while studying! 

Patience is Virtue

How often do people ask you about your weakness? How often do you think about your weaknesses as a person? 

The answer you're likely to realize is that people typically don't ask about your weaknesses, but more commonly your strengths and that it is way easier to think about what you're good at instead of bad at. Recently, I've discovered or not so much discovered but come to the self realization that my patience has to by far be my worst character trait. It's hard for me to sit here and admit the fact that a principle so simple (or so it seems) is the thing I struggle with the most.

I had a conversation this week that really tested my patience and the anger that builds up as I get impatient (This is the conversation that really got me thinking about patience). Throughout the conversation, I realized how hypocritical I was being. I was asking this person to just wait, one of the things that is absolutely hardest for me to do. I think that part of the reason I am so impatient is because I am used to things happening fast, I like to know the answers quickly and I am typically not willing to wait. I struggle with being patient in lots of aspects of my life. For example, I hate waiting at red lights and it drives me bonkers when the people don't turn on a green turn signal when they know that it's a quick light. I like to know my test score almost immediately after I take the test, I like people to reply to my texts in a timely manner, I like people to answer the phone on the beginning rings (if you don't, chances are I hang up). I am not exactly sure why these tendencies happen with me and who knows they might happen with you too, but it is definitely something I need to work on. If I could allude my impatience to one thing it would by my schedule oriented life-style (for the most part).

 Ever since I started driving, I've kind of taken over the whole chauffeuring for my mom and I shouldn't complain because she pays for the gas, but sometimes the whole waiting around thing gets annoying and I now completely understand why moms hate waiting. Over Thanksgiving break, my mom asked me to "transport" Lily between the nail salon and hair salon, these two places are maybe 5 minutes apart. On this particular day, I had what seemed like a million things to do and moving Lily around was not on my schedule. Since I didn't have much of a choice, I headed to pick up Lily with the knowledge that when I got there she would be ready. Little did I know I would have to wait. I had a friend waiting on me at home and expected me around 2 (it was getting close to 2). I waited for what felt like an eternity and started sending my mom some angry texts. One of my most common impatient reactions is some anger and frustration, not healthy I know because really I should just take a breath and wait on her, but I couldn't bring myself to calm down and just be patient. I get frustrated and angry in lots of situations where my patience is tested and I think what I need to realize is that I just need to sit and wait. Easier said than done, I know. 

Not only is my patience tested in this stupid situations, but also in waiting on different things in life. After this weeks earlier post, I've realized that I am not a good waiter at all. I want to think something up and it just happen immediately. For example, I want to know exactly what I'll be doing in 10 years, not because I am curious but because I am not patient enough to wait and see. 

Patience is introduced as a fruit of the spirit in Galatians 5:22 and while looking around for the verse that encaptures what I am trying to share with you, I can't find the exact one that speaks to me. I have found this, “Have patience with all things, but chiefly have patience with yourself. Do not lose courage in considering your own imperfections but instantly set about remedying them– every day begin the task anew.” I think that we need to have patience with ourselves. Everyday is fresh and we should start over in hopes of someway making that weakness a little less weak (contradictory I know). 

What to do? Take a breath when waiting on someone or for something & try not to take your anger out on someone else when your patience is tested. For me this will be sitting in traffic or waiting at a red light. I challenge you to be patient and slow to get angry (James 1:19). 

Is being a mom against feminism?

To get you thinking.... I think we get too caught up in the future and what we're suppose to do with our lives. There, I said it because chances are you don't realize how much time you spend worrying about the future. I do it to and I am very aware of that.

I've been thinking doing a feminism blog for a while and as I started researching I realized I was way in over my head. I had absolutely no idea what I was planning on talking about. I think as I sit here trying to type a blog that rocks your world, I am slowly realizing that if I love what I post and just one person thinks a little harder about the topic I am doing exactly what I should be.

I have people at KR who surround me and continuously pour into me. On Tuesday, I had a conversation at my lunch table after reading parts of Lies Young Women Believe: And the Truth's that Set Them Free. I started reading a chapter on the future and how Satan has been against femininity for all of time (Mr. Arnold, thanks for getting me thinking on this). We started the almost 30 minute conservation on talking about equal-ism vs. feminism, equal rights, and then it led to talking about gender distinctions and the stereotypes of our world based on gender. The stereotypes are the mom is suppose to be the stay at home mom and the dad is suppose to be the worker. Although these stereotypes exist in our world, we have to realize that these are parts are designed to be equal parts. God created woman to be a helper to men. This led to a little debate in the conversation, if taken the wrong way, one might think that the statement in Genesis 2:18 (you might want to take a second and look at the verse) takes away from the independence a woman should have (which is where the whole debate started). My selfish 16 year old tendencies are telling me that I want to be independent and I don't want my future spouse to think I am not capable of working and achieving my goals. Once we realize that God intentionally has a counter part for us, it is important to know those stereotypes don't have to be real and the balance of work and family can be created based on personal preference. Part of the reason I have my independence and hope to be apart of the woman work force is thanks to my mom. Both of my parents have jobs (ironically very similar jobs), both of my parents create a life for me that I love, both of my parents have created an extremely memorable life for me (thus far), both of my parents work hard at their jobs, what both of my parents should know is that they defy a stereotype that exists in our world and I love that about my parents. I wouldn't change the way our life is for the world. I know the time and energy my parents put into creating this life for me, the life that allows me to wake up in a warm house and attend King's Ridge, come on y'all that rocks. As we finished the debate on stereotypes of our world and different rights, we switched tables to the second reason God created woman, He commands Adam and Eve to be fruitful.

Lucy started talking about Republican Motherhood (your duty is to raise the next generation). In the moment I had not a clue where she was going with this and now as I write all this out (& listen to it a second time thru) I know exactly what she means. God grants the greatest gift of all to us (girls), being a mother. What compliment is greater than knowing the Lord entrusts the future generation in your hands. I get it, it seems like pressure because I feel it. I think about it everyday when I wakeup and get worried about the future and college because what if I am not doing enough for my future kids and my future family. The unity that comes together from man and woman creates the balance (like I said with my parents above) and that balance creates a family and the family that creates the next generation. At this point in my story and as a 16 year old, I struggle to realize that my list of jobs and professions I hope to pursue will never be as great of as an accomplishment as being a mother. Don't get me wrong, what I don't mean is forgetting everything I've ever wanted to do. I think the problem we see in our society today is thinking you can't have both. Being a mother isn't something you should have to sacrifice your dreams and goals for (although I am sure at some point sacrifices come).  

This led us talking about living life. If I'm honest with you, I would tell you I wake up somedays and just go thru the works; school, homework, repeat cycle. I realized while talking about this and the heat of this conversation that I loved every part of this topic and I loved talking to my friends about it. I really just felt as ease and really felt the influence of friends in this stage of life.

I realize that chances are this blog is all over the place, but if there is one thing you can gain from this it is that YOU SHOULD LIVE. I don't mean  go thru the works everyday, but really live and love and appreciate the special moments (like yesterday for me). I'm not sure why I loved this discussion so much, but it might just be because I've been waiting for someone to finally answer the question of where should I start?

What to do next? Take a breath and realize that you have so much life to look forward to, say thanks to your parents (even for doing the dishes) they sacrifice more than we know, realize that there is so much life to look forward to and you one wanting to have kids isn't and shouldn't be a sacrifice from everything else you've wanted to do.